Sam Docherty always anticipated that his body would signal when it was time to retire. Having battled two cancer diagnoses, undergone three knee reconstructive surgeries, and dealt with numerous serious injuries—including issues with a toe, shoulder, and even an eye—he faced more than his fair share of challenges. In his last AFL match, an accidental knee to the nose left him playing with a tampon up one nostril to staunch the bleeding.
Ultimately, it was his mental state that led to his decision to step away from the game. His final season with Carlton proved to be demanding. He faced being benched twice, and the team’s performance was dismal. Coach Michael Voss found himself under significant pressure, and Docherty received feedback from club officials insisting he needed to improve his mood when coming to the club. Feelings of disrespect, detachment, anger, and confusion overwhelmed him. Shortly before announcing his retirement, the club informed him they would not be renewing his contract.
Reflecting on the past year, Docherty reveals that he does not miss the internal politics or the scrutiny that accompanies being part of a prominent club like Carlton. He no longer endures constant physical pain or worries whether it’s safe to lift his children during swimming classes or to enjoy a night out at the pub. However, he acknowledges the adjustment period and the void that often follows retirement.
“That process-driven, elite-athlete lifestyle, with clear goals, and with everything mapped out – it could be all-consuming at the time,” Docherty shares with Guardian Australia. “But it’s also something I find myself missing in retirement. And I miss that really clear purpose, that overarching picture of who you are and where you’re going when you’re a sportsperson.”
Docherty, like many athletes, recognizes his obsessive tendencies, which at times bordered on addictive behavior. This obsession revealed itself in various aspects of his life—from sprinting 400 meters between chemotherapy sessions to his rigorous approach to rehabilitation, and even to developing a gambling issue.
“As an athlete, they’re great traits to have at times, but they can also be incredibly unhealthy,” he states. “They definitely helped me in my ability to get back from hard things, especially my obsession with the level of detail, that ability to flick the switch when required. I was able to go to levels in a high-performance environment that few others were willing to, because of my obsession with it. But it got me in a lot of trouble as well.”
Reflecting on a Tumultuous Journey
Docherty succinctly summarizes the past fifteen years: “Obviously life’s been pretty hectic,” Shortly after joining Carlton from Brisbane in late 2013, he found himself on a high-altitude training camp in Arizona when he received distressing news. His father, Eddie, who worked as a gate ranger on Phillip Island protecting penguins, suffered a heart attack while enjoying a drink at the pub. He passed away at the age of 53.
His first major knee injury occurred in November during a training session at a poorly maintained local dog park. The injury was silent; it sounded like a rubber band snapping. It took a while for anyone to grasp the severity of the injury. Almost a year later, while participating in a drill called “joint compromised athlete” he suffered a similar fate against Charlie Curnow. He was out shopping when he learned he would miss an additional season. Leading reconditioning expert Bill Knowles labeled him a JCA—“You will never come out of this,”—and informed him, “You’ll have to do things differently to everyone else.”
Confronting Cancer and Its Challenges
During the early days of the Covid-19 pandemic, Docherty found a lump on his testicle. He describes it as “a pale, smooth sickly creature” comparing its texture to the fat cap on a steak. Following surgery, his doctor fitted him with a prosthetic testicle, which Docherty compares to a hard squash ball. A year later, the cancer had metastasized to his lymph nodes, lungs, and stomach, necessitating four rounds of chemotherapy.
Due to strict lockdown measures in Victoria, Docherty was prohibited from having visitors. Friends and family would leave food at his front door, and they communicated through a partially opened window. He lost significant weight and all his hair during treatment, describing his appearance as resembling Gollum from Lord of the Rings, “But I’d been at rock bottom. “To look at me – severely underweight, with no hair on my body, having been barely able to run, few would have believed I could have been able to play the most elite level of football and perform. I’d had so much football taken away from me, I was just desperate to play. But it was more than that. It was so crazy, so strange, but so satisfying to be representing a large cohort of people I’ve never actually met. Here I was, a frontman for something bigger than me.”
Docherty also endured a 10-centimeter incision in his abdominal wall, similar to a C-section. He remarked that when he looks in the mirror, it seems as though he has been in a knife fight. Amid these trials, the club requested that he take a pay cut to create salary cap space for Fremantle midfielder Adam Cerra. They later asked him to resign as captain and step away from the leadership group, suggesting he should concentrate on his health.
A Triumphant Return to Football
Six months after his first cycle of chemotherapy, during the 2022 season opener against Richmond in front of 72,000 fans, he experienced his most treasured football moment. “I went into footy thinking being successful was winning best and fairest awards, playing 300 games, being All Australian,” he recalls. “And I walked away with a completely different definition – one that was more to do with me as a person, the amount of people I impacted positively, the hope and drive I gave others.”
“To look at me – severely underweight, with no hair on my body, having been barely able to run, few would have believed I could have been able to play the most elite level of football and perform. I’d had so much football taken away from me, I was just desperate to play. But it was more than that. It was so crazy, so strange, but so satisfying to be representing a large cohort of people I’ve never actually met. Here I was, a frontman for something bigger than me.”
Docherty ultimately finished second in Carlton’s best and fairest award that year, trailing only captain Patrick Cripps, who also secured his first Brownlow Medal. “I went into footy thinking being successful was winning best and fairest awards, playing 300 games, being All Australian,” he reflects. “And I walked away with a completely different definition – one that was more to do with me as a person, the amount of people I impacted positively, the hope and drive I gave others.”
- What it Takes by Sam Docherty with Konrad Marshall is published by Simon & Schuster and released on 27 July
